


Panic Room

by hopelesssapphic



Series: Criminal Minds AU Series [4]
Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: Angst, F/F, Gay, Lesbian
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-17
Updated: 2020-12-17
Packaged: 2021-03-10 22:08:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,450
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28134450
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hopelesssapphic/pseuds/hopelesssapphic
Summary: The reader runs into an ex and things don't go well.
Relationships: Penelope Garcia/Reader
Series: Criminal Minds AU Series [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2023985
Kudos: 24





	Panic Room

**Author's Note:**

> I'm still on that fic spree. Also the og name was Demons but I renamed it panic room because I've listened to it for over 3 hours during the course of writing this.

Stepping out of the elevator you head straight for the conference room, there's a case and Hotch wants the team there as soon as possible. The only problem is that it’s the middle of the night and there is supposed to be a new member joining the team today. 

Pulling open the doors to the bullpen you walk in and move to walk straight to the conference room. You look over and see Morgan, JJ, and Spencer gathering near their desks talking to who you assume is the newbie. 

You see them look to their left to say something to JJ and you see the face of someone you thought you would never see again in a million years. Emotions and tears start welling and threatening to spill over. You turn away wanting to get out of here as fast as possible, in your frenzy you turn and bump into Penelope.

Looking down at the floor you apologize, your voice barely a whisper. Moving to get anywhere but here and Penelope sees the look on your face. She grabs your arm and pulls you out of the bullpen all the way to her lair. 

Your eyes never leave the floor and you use all your strength to stop yourself from breaking down in the middle of the hallway which is surprisingly swarming with agents this early in the morning.

Crossing the threshold into Penelope’s layer you drop your stuff on the floor as she shuts the door. You finally let your emotions out and tears start flowing uncontrollably as you make no attempt to stop them. Not having the strength to care anymore.

You don’t know how or when but you’re sitting in a chair, you’re grateful not having to worry about your body giving out on you, you want to sit still but your body starts shaking and you can’t do anything to stop it. Penny sits across from you in her own chair, not saying a word.

After a few minutes the tears start drying up and you feel like your emotions are under control. You look up expecting to see judgment on Penelope’s face but are met with a soft look of compassion. 

You look up and see the expression on her face soften. You give up on your composure and let your body slump forward resting your elbows on your knees, your head in your hands. 

Not having the energy to do anything about it you just sit there until Penelope pulls you closer to her and you lay your head on her chest as a new wave of emotions spill over and you can’t stop yourself from crying more as the events of two years ago are brought back up to the surface.

You try so hard to hold back your sobs you forget to breath causing yourself to start hyperventilating scared that you weren’t going to start breathing again. You feel a hand on your head stroking your hair, grounding you to reality as you attempt to call yourself.

The tears finally stop and Penelope grabs a box of tissues off of her desk still stroking her hand through your hair. Taking in a deep breath you hiccup, causing several more to follow after it each one more aggressive than the last. 

“Hey. I’m going to go get you some water, ok?” She carefully stands up trying not to bother you too much, “I’ll be right back,” she whispers before hurrying out of the room. 

You pull one of the tissues out of the box she handed you and you wipe the tears away from your cheeks. Silent tears replacing the ones you’re wiping away.

She's back only a minute later and hands you a mug full of water, “drink it, it will help with the hiccups.” You take the glass raising it to your lips and take a sip not wanting to drink it too fast and make everything worse. 

You look up at Penelope not understanding how someone can be so kind and compassionate and put others before themself. “I’m sorry,” you whisper, feeling awful for having this kind of episode so early in the morning. 

She makes an expression on her face that you can’t place. “Don’t ever feel bad, something like that doesn’t just happen, what triggered that?” She looks genuinely concerned and you don’t know how to explain exactly what happened. 

“I don’t… I-,” you struggle to pull in a deep breath before a lone tear slides down your cheek. You suck in a deep breath preparing to tell something you’ve never told anyone, “a few years ago before the BAU I was dating my now ex girlfriend. She was emotionally abusive and always told me I was worthless and unlovable and she only dated me out of pity. It took months of therapy to get over that mindset she’d instilled in me, that’s when I decided to join the BAU.” You choke back a sob not wanting to start crying again. “I just never thought I’d see her here, somewhere I actually feel safe of all places.”

Anger crosses Penelope’s face before she takes a deep breath, creasing her eyebrows the look of compassion returning. “Y/N you are the most amazing, strong person I have ever met. Nothing she ever said to you was true,” she raises your chin so your gaze meets hers, “I need you to look at me and know that you-you are one of the best people I have ever met and whatever she did to you she will not get away with.” 

You let out a small chuckle knowing damn well Penelope would do anything for the people she loves. “That’s nice and all but I don’t want to cause any trouble with the team, they looked like they were actually enjoying themselves and getting along out there. And you’re required to say all that stuff you’re my friend.”

“It doesn’t matter what the rest of the team thinks about her, if they knew what you told me they would feel the same way I do, no one hurts our family and gets away with it.” She looks sad before continuing, “I need you to know you are the most beautiful and inspiring person I have ever met, every time you go into the field I’m scared you’re never coming back, and that hurts worse than anything. I know there’s always a chance something will go wrong and I’ll never get to tell you something important.”

You lean slightly forward before a questioning look crosses your face, “And what would that important thing you need to tell me be?” A slight smirk crossing your face.

She leans forward as well, whispering right next to your ear causing you to shiver, “I love you, Y/N,” she says before you smash your face into hers kissing her like there’s no tomorrow. All the stress and confusion and tears from the last 30 minutes falling away. How could something so amazing come out of something so bad?

Penny reaches her hand up, tangling it in your hair pulling your face impossibly closer until you both pull away for air, her hand falling out of your hair. “I love you too Penelope Garcia,” you say, laying your head on her shoulder. 

You could stay like that forever until Penelope’s phone starts blowing up with messages. 

Aaron Hotcher (Boss): Do you know where Y/N is? Wheels up in 20. 

Chocolate Thunder: We saw Y/N by the conference earlier but we can’t find her anywhere. Any idea what's going on?

Boy wonder: Is everything ok? No one can find Y/N.

Papa Pasta: Any idea what's going on with Y/N? 

Emily Prentiss: Everything ok? Y/N’s not answering her phone. 

Penelope sends out a group text not saying much just wanting to let them know everything’s ok. 

Penelope Garcia started a group chat

Penelope Garcia Added Aaron Hotchner (Boss)  
Penelope Garcia Added Papa Pasta  
Penelope Garcia Added Boy Wonder  
Penelope Garcia Added Chocolate Thunder  
Penelope Garcia Added Emily Prentiss  
Penelope Garcia Added Jayge

Penelope Garcia: I’m not going to say too much because it's not my business.  
But everything is fine.  
Team meeting after this case, I will want to specify.  
Also newbie is not allowed

Jayge: Are you sure everything is fine?

Penelope Garcia: Yep.  
We’ll worry about it after the case, everything is fine rn.

Aaron Hotchner (Boss): We’ll talk about it when we get back.  
Keep and eye on Y/N.

Penelope looks over to where Y/N is sitting and quickly decides that here is truly not the best place for healing to get done. She packs up her laptop and grabs both of your bags. Leading you out the door.

You make your way to the elevator pushing the down button and waiting. You both step into the elevator pushing the button for your floor, watching the doors close. You lay your head on Penelope’s shoulder and let out the breath you’ve been holding since earlier that morning. 

When you exit the building you realize the sun has come up. The ride home is quiet and comfortable. You pull your keys out of your bag and open the door, throwing everything on the table next to the living room.

Penelope suggests watching a movie to take your mind off of your ex and you agree, picking Finding Nemo. While you put the movie in Penny sits in the corner of the couch curling her legs up underneath her body. 

You grab the remote and sit next to her leaning against her and laying your head on her shoulder. 

Not even halfway into the movie you fall asleep your head in Penelope’s lap as she plays with your hair looking down at you adoringly. 

Minutes later Penelope gets a video call on her laptop from the rest of the team on the jet. She answers it still stroking your hair thinking about how precious this is. 

The newbie tries to ask a few questions and Penny throws back some snarky remarks, not wanting someone who could hurt Y/N so much to get comfortable with their job. 

Penelope doesn’t really pay attention to any of the questions the team is asking and they can tell she’s preoccupied so they decide to call her back when they land. 

Just as she shuts her laptop you start to wake up, sitting up and rubbing your eyes clearly having not gotten enough sleep. 

You lay down and motion for Penelope to as well. You lay your head on her chest falling back asleep to the rhythm of her heart. She puts her arms around as she starts drifting off to sleep. The events of this morning no longer important. 

-A few days later, after the case-

Penelope Garcia: Team meeting in the conference room in one hour.  
This is important and I want everyone there except newbie!

Chocolate Thunder: What happened anyway?

Penelope Garcia: That's for me to know and you guys to figure out in a little while.

Boy Wonder: Ok Ok, just let me finish up my paperwork first.

Jayge: You’re acting like your paperwork takes you that long.

Boy Wonder: It’s not my fault I’m a genius.

Papa Pasta: Alright everyone, back to work.  
That paperwork isn’t going to do itself.

(Private Message)

Penelope Garcia: Where is newbie at currently?

Emily Prentiss: Sitting at her desk.  
Why?

Penelope Garcia: Is there anyway you could create a distraction, say take her to a different floor for a minute.

Emily Prentiss: Anything for my favorite technical analyst.  
Is that what the meeting is about?

Penelope Garcia: More or less.  
I can’t really elaborate until then.  
But getting her out of the way for a few minutes is really important.

Emily Prentiss: Consider it done. 

It’s almost been an hour and you and Penelope make your way to the conference room, Emily distracting the newbie so you can move safely to the conference room, not really wanting to have an episode today. 

Months of therapy only did so much to heal your emotions, you never thought you would have to see her again, especially in one of the few places you feel safe.

You and Penny sit in the conference room, blinds shut, until everyone slowly starts filling into the room, each taking a seat at the table. 

Penelope starts off the meeting pulling up a slideshow on the projector screen. “So, I know you're all wondering why we’re here today.” click “the newbie, Y/N has said it’s ok to share what happened the other day.”

Hotch speaks up, “I’ve already had all of this brought up on my end we just need approval from the rest of the team.” He looks kind of angry and you can’t tell if that's good or bad. 

“To get back to our lovely presentation,” she clicks the screen again, “I need you all to listen very carefully as your decision on this matter is very important.”

She starts describing the situation starting with the events from earlier this week and ending with everything that happened two years ago. 

Throughout the entire explanation you get concerned looks from the entire team but mostly Emily and Rossi, knowing Emily sees you like a sister and Rossi like a daughter. 

“Alright,” Hotch says, his voice more stern than usual, “what is the verdict on the situation?”

Derek speaks first, “honestly, the BAU is family and if anyone hurts one of us like that they shouldn’t be here.”

Everyone nods in agreement. “So we’re going to need to look for a new team member after this but, I think we’d all prefer that.” Rossi pipes up.

“Ok, everyone meeting dismissed,” Penelope says, maybe a little too cheery. Everyone moves to get up, going back to paperwork. 

Rossi walks over to where you’re standing next to Penelope and pulls you into a hug, “I’m sorry kid, I wish we could have known someone could be that awful,” he looks genuinely upset. 

“You guys couldn’t have known she was like that while interviewing her. She’s a manipulator, she wasn’t abusive until a few months into our relationship and she convinced me that I deserved it.” You feel awful wondering how you let her brainwash you and convince you of everything she said. 

You now have the most wonderful family who try everyday to pick each other's broken pieces up off the ground and put them back together again. It took so long to realize she had said all those things to manipulate you, and being a part of a supportive family who never puts each other down puts that into perspective.

**Author's Note:**

> I may or may not have cried a lot while writing this 'cause I'm an emotional bitch. 
> 
> Also I don't know how this managed to be so long but I'm proud of that.


End file.
